experience
Take 3 deep breaths in through the nose & out through the mouth. Use the next 5 minutes for silent reflection.
As you breathe, give permission for the mind to wander. Follow anything but words. Maybe you find a memory, a shape, a color, or a place.
Return to the breath if this feels chaotic. Notice how that changes the course of your thoughts.
As you read the rest of this post, check in with your breath when prompted. Let it be a guide to return to the present moment. Read this as many times as necessary in order for what is being said to sink in.
Introduction
Yoga is a practice that has been around for centuries. It will always be there. Even if the busyness of modern life gets in the way, yoga will always be there to welcome you home. In this reflection, I speak to my experience of taking an unintentional break from the things I love. I ask the difficult question: how do I return?
Reflection
The last few months of my life have felt like treading water. Work, school, yoga and life events have created in me a sense of constant urgency, a feeling like I am a few minutes short of drowning. Every once in a while, I will get a glimpse of life above the surface. Then, something will happen that pulls me back under. I know that this is not an isolated experience, and I am allowing it to drive my decisions as I move through the next few months.
Before continuing, take three deep breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth; relax the muscles in your forehead, jaw and shoulders. Notice how this affects your mind.
For me, the transition into difficulty is one that happens slowly but is noticed suddenly. Over time, I find myself waking up closer to when I need to leave in the morning, rushing to get through the day, and going through the motions. Then something awakens and I realize what is happening.
Sometimes it is a friend inviting me to reflect, and sometimes I get motivation to open my journal; only to realize how long it’s been since I last wrote. It is not enough to just acknowledge this drowning feeling, however. It requires attention, mindfulness and purposeful practice to guide my mind back to an intentional way of living. This means disrupting the daily routine.
Is it easy? Nope! But is anything worth doing or experiencing in life always easy?
If you have spent time away from the mat, disrupting the daily routine could simply mean getting your mat out. You don’t have to run a full hour sequence the first time back on the mat. Start small. Yoga can feel unattainable and unsustainable if you let it, but it can also simply be a space for you to sit and reflect.
If the mat is out, I am much more likely to practice. If I practice, life feels calmer and more sincere. When life feels calmer and more sincere, I can put my attention toward things that really matter. Slowly, bit by bit, I find my way to solid ground.
It takes courage, intention and slow, slow progress, but I am reminded, once again, that life comes and goes in waves. There will be days, weeks, months even when I feel I am being swept out to sea, and yet, with practice, I will be able to find my way back to the shore.
Experience
Come back to the breath one last time. Allow the mind to focus solely on the breath. If the mind begins to wander, notice without judgement and bring the attention back to the breath. This is where true practice lies. In moments where things feel completely out of control, you can take solace in knowing the breath will always welcome you home.
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